The "not-so-big" birthday

It is your 36th birthday. 36, not a number of any consequence. It does not make one question ones life choices as much as one does on their 30th nor does it make one feel as old as one does on the 35th. It is one of those birthdays, that come and go, one of the birthdays which will probably not be remembered. It is a day in ones life, another day of existence and, well, household chores, if you are a woman. 

If 35 was the year of urgency, 36 is the year of calm I think. Most Indian parents and peers have given up on you. No one is forcing you to get married or have kids anymore. No one, including probably you,  expects you to do anything drastically different in your career or with your life.  If you haven't achieved it by now or started on a different path already, no one expects you to take it now or even believes that you will. 

You do mourn, like on each birthday, you mourn over what this year could've been, what life could've been. But the mourning itself is peripheral. It is said that the unhappiest folks are those who are talented, ambitious and lazy. You believed you are talented, that you are wasting your talent but now the scale tilts towards comfort and away from hustle that comes with reaching your true potential. Have you given up? Was this life all about? You lament for half a day, and then you forget. Cause the day after brings with it work, chores, kids probably.. existing. 

So the 36th is not of any consequence yes, but you realise in time not today or the even the next day, that rest of your life is what really matters.

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